Super Annoying Artsy People

So the other night my wife and I went out to Cheap Charlies after the the Icehawks game. And we sat next to the MOST ANNOYING PEOPLE EVER. It was really entertaining listening to their conversation. (The good gentleman "simply ADORES Tim Burton")

Now I know you have seen these d-bag artsy type people before. They're all over. This particular couple were SC4 theater/ballet students in probably their late 20's. Now there's nothing wrong with being 30 and going to SC4. That's pretty awesome actually, good for you. I went to SC4. It's a great school, but it's freakin COMMUNITY COLLEGE. They accept EVERYONE. These people where acting like it was the most prestigious university in the Ivy League.

Anyway, I won't go into detail about this particular conversation, but I will give some tips on discovering S.A.A.P.s (Super Annoying Artsy People). They are really really fun to listen to and make fun of. Try it, you'll laugh.

1. Clothing. Look for scarves. They love scarves, no matter the weather. Also kind of weird hats. Or pretty much anything from Hott Topic. (although not all Hott Topic apparel clothed people are SAAPs. They could just be emo kids or something. Nowhere near as entertaining.)

2. Hair. Guy SAAPs will usually have facial hair. It's always really neatly trimmed. Whether a goatee, moustache, or full beard, it is disturbing tidy.
The women SAAPs will 9 out of 10 times have short, kind of jaggedly cut hair. You know what I'm talking about. I actually like that style a lot, it just happens to be the haircut of choice for know it alls.

3. Conversation. The only TRUE way to tell a Super Annoying Artsy Person. The big give away: an incredible amount of self importance. They think they are the most intelligent, sophisticated, and knowledgeable people in the world. They are EXTREMELY amused with themselves, and tend to tell stories with an amazing amount of detail and side stories woven in, but in the end have ABSOLUTELY NO POINT. You'll be able to tell right away. They believe themselves to be the authority on pretty much EVERYTHING.

So yeah that's about it. Try and scope some out, and just sit and listen. You'll feel better about yourself.

And if you happen to be a SAAP, no offense, I'm sure you're a great person once we get to know you, but just listening to you, you are not actually awesome, you're a huge loser.

Some profound and thought provoking thoughts about Jon & Kate Plus 8

They both need to shut up and go away.

The End.

Coldest summer EVER!

Wow it's been a while since I updated this. I forgot my password. You all know how that is.

Anyway, quick side note, I was looking at all our blogs here at WBTI.com. I noticed Sean and Erin are always talking about entertainment news, Annie Spears usually has some kind of funny news story, and Ben Coburn rambles about the most random stuff EVER. What do I do? I just kind of complain about everything. Someone has to do it. So here's some more whining:

It has been a freezing cold summer. That is seriously NOT cool. Compare this summer to the ones of yore (that's a weird way of saying "the past", fyi). But yeah, just ice. You know what I usually wear in the summer? Basketball shorts. Thats it. And I'm very comfortable. This year? Jeans and a freaking long sleeved shirt almost all the time. That's wrong. Summer should be for running around almost naked.

A great thing about living in the Blue Water area is the super awesome Lake. So nice. In the summer I'm normally in there every single day. I haven't even been in yet. I went to the beach once, but the water was waaay to cold. It's really depressing.

I cant even drive around with my windows down at night! I've probably had the heat on more than the AC in my car. What the &#@$%?

Who cares what Al Gore says, I WANT global warming!

I think I'm part vampire

I think I am officially the whitest non albino person in Michigan. I'm pretty darn pale. I practically glow in the dark.

It's hard trying to get tan too. I work until 6:30 pretty much every day, and I'm a busy guy. I can't really sit around in the sun. (Although I wish I could. That'd be sweet.)

Anyway, I'm going on vacation to California in a few weeks so I NEED to get a tan. But I can't! I've been going to the tanner for a week and there is absolutely no change.

I think I'm just doomed to pastiness.

So if you're kind of bummed that you don't look your best for the beach, don't worry, because I look waaaaay worse than you.

Yet another person talking about swine flu...

OH MY GOD WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!!! ...again.

Holy crap people are worried about the swine flu. It's all I hear about on the news. I went out to dinner with my parents the other day and they told me to make sure I washed my hands so I didn't get swine flu. Seriously.

Anyway, I'm not worried about it. Remember the bird flu? SARS? There's a new disease every year. It's like nature's fashion statement.

Do you know ANYONE who even knew anyone who caught the bird flu let alone died from it? Probably not. We live in Michigan. That stuff is in like New Mexico.

We will all be fine. Chill out.

And now that I say that, in an ironic twist of fate I'll probably end up being the only person in this state who dies from swine flu.

LOL!!!

Hair trouble

Yeah, I don't know what to do with my hair. It's getting pretty long. (It's about at my eyebrows right now.) I want to cut it but I don't.

I've tried a ton of hairstyles. I normally have it either really really short or kind of mid length. I've had it sort of long and shaggy like now, and I've even shaved my head completely (which I actually liked a lot but my wife hates).

So I don't know what to do. I want to grow it real long since I've never done that, but I just hate the length it's at now. It gets messed up really easily. So should I go back to my boring mid length haircut or bite the bullet and look like a doofus for another few months and get cool long hair? I think it's kind of weird that I'm putting this much time and thought into this.

Oh well. At least I have hair. Unlike some people who I won't mention, but their name starts with B (and ends with en Coburn. Haha. He's bald.)

SOMEONE always has it worse.

I was talking with some friends the other day about how amazingly bad the economy is. Everyone is losing their jobs, things are expensive, it generally sucks. We all work like crazy (yeah I have a real job besides working on radio) and have pretty much no money.

Life is hard. But then I realized, most of us really don't have it that bad. No matter how bad you have it, someone has it worse.

If you have a crappy job, just be happy you have one, more and more people don't every day. You're lucky. If you don't have a job, be happy you still have somewhere to live at least. If you're homeless, be glad you're not addicted to crack. If you're homeless and addicted to crack, be happy you're not blind at least. And if you're a homeless blind crack addict, be glad you're not paralyzed or something.

And I guess if you're a blind, paralyzed, homeless crack addict, you're PROBABLY not reading this, so there's no point explaining how someone has it worse than you. But there's always someone who wishes they were you, eve if you're a blind paralyzed, homeless crack addict.

Smiley face!

:)

Diets are poopy.

Holy cow I hate diets. I've been on one for like 3 weeks and I just can't take it anymore.

For those of you who don't know me, I LOVE food. Kind of obsessed really. Luckily I'm young and have a really fast metabolism, so I'm still in good shape, despite eating like 4,000 calories a day. (That's about twice what a normal person should eat.) Taco Bell, burgers, pizza, fried chicken, I'm all over it.

But about a month ago, my wife went on some crazy Oprah diet. Because I'm such a great guy, I thought: Hey, I'm not going to be a jerk and eat all this great food in front of her, while she's eating cardboard and leaves. That and she was getting mad at me. And an angry, hungry wife is not good to be around. So I joined the diet. That or be in the doghouse until 2012.

So at first I thought, hey, this won't be that bad, I'll just work on my six-pack and get really cut and buff looking. It'll be cool.

It's not cool. All I think about is food. I'm starving. I would kill someone for a burger. This is awful. I am never going on a diet again after I get off this.

I seriously need some help. Does anyone have tips on making it through a diet?

It is truly a tragic event.

I hate weather.

I hate all weather. I first realized this when I started thinking how much I hate winter. I mean, this snow is just ridiculous. I'm sick of it. It's cold, and hard to drive. And if you drive a dark colored car, it'll look awful from all the salt and snow and whatever. I can't wait for spring.

But then I realized I hate spring too. Everything is melted. It is super wet and muddy everywhere. Death to shoes. I hate it. For someone who plays a lot of basketball, you don't want to tromp through a swamp in Air Jordans. And like winter, your car will look like crap. I don't like spring.

Then there's summer, which is probably the best of the 4 seasons, but still has it's downsides. Like 95 degree weather. When I'm not working here at WBTI, I do a lot of manual labor (gotta pay those bills somehow). It gets HOT. Not fun. Plus I sweat a lot. I will soak a shirt in like an hour. It's pretty gross. It can be hard to cool down to. You can always add another sweater or blanket to stay warm, but you can only take off so many clothes.

And then there's Fall. I actually like fall, except for one thing: leaves. Oh my god I hate leaves. There everywhere. I hate raking. They get in the house and get ground up. And I hate raking. They suck.

But when it comes right down to it, I think we can all agree that winter is by far the worst. Bring on the mud.

50 Nuggets!

With a little help from Annie Spears, I ate 50 Chicken Nuggets in one sitting!

I believe some congratulations are in order.

Now I just have to work out for like 5 hours to make up for it...

Baby gets kicked in the face!

Parents, don't let this happen to your kids!

Seriously. Watch your kids.




Am I a bad person for thinking this is kind of funny?

Why is Impossible Trivia so Awesome? (AKA I love Caseys Pizza)

If you don't know what impossible trivia is, you should. Click here to be enlightened.

The reason it's so great, is because you get FREE FOOD from Casey's Pizza and Subs in downtown Port Huron. I love Casey's. It's my favorite restaurant. It has incredible variety. So awesome in fact, I decided to try EVERY item on the menu. There are 72 total, and I'm over half way there. (the #5 is my favorite so far) I would recommend everyone try all of Casey's food. It rules. The only problem is that it costs money, and who has a ton of money to throw around these days?

So that is why Impossible Trivia is so great. Casey's Pizza and Subs. Free. 'Nuff said.

First Blog!

Hi. I'm The Bob. So I guess I have a blog now. I must be cool.

Well, I guess I'll give you a little Bob history about my time in the wonderful world of radio. I don't know if ANYONE cares at all, but I don't know where else to really start a blog. So here we go:

I was hired here at RadioFirst (the company that owns WBTI) on my 18th birthday, January 1st 2008. Yes, I'm a New Year's Baby, and no it's not cool. Everything is closed on my birthday, and everyone's partied out. It's poopy. Anyway, I came in and started out as a board operator, which is basically the guy who sits around and presses buttons that play commercials. Super easy. So after about a month of that, Ben Coburn called and asked if I wanted to be on WBTI. Obviously I said yes. I also remember jumping around with happiness like a little kid on Christmas. I love radio.

So I started the very awesome Saturday Night on Demand, a request show from 7:00-Midnight. It's pretty fun. Call and request something! (810) 966-9696 or Toll Free (877) 966-9696. I'm very friendly. For the most part.

Oh I almost forgot, I met my wife here too! Deidre Lynn, from Q-Country 107. We became awesome friends instantly. We used to sit in her truck and talk until 5:00 AM. I've never gotten to know someone so fast. So after a while we started dating, and made the snap decision to get married, on June 26th. It's been great so far.

So that's about it. 2008 was a pretty good year. Started an awesome job and got married. Not too bad.

Well, this blog was excessively long, but you have to start somewhere, right?